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  • Writer's pictureSusan Pattis

How To Stop Sadness? (Part I)

Updated: Mar 13, 2023



In today’s wild world, after the pandemic and inflation, many people feel sad and depressed. I have received more readers’ requests on how to stop sadness lately because some lost loved ones due to Covid-19 infection. Some readers are unemployed due to the economic slowdown. Let’s talk about sadness and the coping strategies to stop the sad feelings and focus on happy things. Please send me your sad stories and your solutions to stop the sadness.


Everyone feels sad for different reasons in life, and it is a normal feeling for humans. Do not feel bad if you feel sad now because millions might have painful emotions in different parts of the world. I feel sad when a loved one I care about leave without saying goodbye kindly; I also feel sad when I watch a heart-breaking movie (for example, one of my favorite movies: Everything Everywhere All at Once). I do not try to stop the sad feelings because sadness sometimes helps me discover myself by searching inside my heart and soul without looking outside for reasons or justifications.


You can heal the sad feelings over time. Do not expect instant magic to stop sadness since it is unlike a glass of water that can be refilled easily when empty. Sadness is part of life, and our responsibility is to cope. Our emotion is the most complicated thing, and we must learn to face all kinds of feelings and emotions as humans. If you live alone, you must make peace with loneliness; if you feel sad, you have to shake hands with it. I want to share the possible ways to stop sadness sooner and easier.


· Imagine You’re in a Movie - Your life is your movie, and you are the screenwriter, director, and leading role. It’s time to turn yourself into a blockbuster. Use the line “This is my movie” to help you make tough decisions to heal yourself and pursue your dreams.


· Let Yourself Get Excited About the Little Things - I had a friend who worked at Harvard, had a Ph.D. and an MD, ran marathons, and traveled worldwide, but you know what put the biggest smile on his face– Chinese Fried Rice.


· Do a Little More - Let's say you're working on a finished project; ask yourself, “How could I improve this?” Now do that with everything in your life. Achieving something can help you overcome sadness.


· Ask: “What Would the Strongest Version of Myself Do?” - Anytime you can’t choose what to do, ask, “What would the strongest version of myself do?” The strongest you will not allow sadness to beat you.


· Explore for Cool Things - Hang it by your bed, and every night before you go to sleep, write one cool thing you did that day. You’ll eventually start looking for cool things to do to write them on your calendar. New hobbies will replace the sad feeling in your mind soon.


· “How Can I Make This More Exciting?” - Ask that question whenever you’re out with friends; your nights will go from average to legendary in minutes. Walk out of your comfort zones and participate in more social activities with new friends.


· Raise Your Standards Every Month - Pick one skill you want to cultivate, and raise your standards gradually by putting in more effort than the previous week. You do not have to spend time recalling sad memories or feelings.


· Play, Dance, Lift, Run, Jog - I go to pickleball games often in a local park to stay fit and healthy. Although I am usually one of the weakest players there, I enjoy the practice and get better every time I do. If I can do it, you can.


· Live Everyday Your Last Day of Life - Keep that thought in your head; none of us know how much time we have left, so working on yourself, like waking up tomorrow, is not guaranteed. This thought helps you stop feeling sad because you have precious things to feel grateful for before leaving this world.


· Spend Less Time on the Internet - I use the app self-control to block websites while writing. Reduce at least 80% of your social media time. Social media is full of fake news, sad news, and horrible things to fill our minds with sadness and stress.


· Understand People Mindfully - Study body language, facial expressions, group dynamics, and social conditioning, allowing you to see through people's tricks and intentions. Still, even more importantly, it will enable you to see through your consciousness and inner feelings.


· It Is a Gift To Be Here on Planet Earth - You won the race that mattered the most; you’re a human here on earth now. Feeling special is overrated; being happy because you exist is where it is. Being human allows us to evolve and transform throughout our lifetimes with all kinds of experiences, including sadness, resentment, or other unpleasant feelings.


To Be Continued.

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