top of page
  • Writer's pictureSusan Pattis

Nine Reasons Behind Women’s Infidelities

Updated: Jul 20, 2021

Women do cheat, although the percentage is slightly lower compared to men. Men cheat for literally no reason sometimes, but women only cheat for specific reasons. Generally speaking, women do not cheat after getting married or having stable relationships unless they are absolutely unhappy with their current sex lives. Some female friends told me that they would cheat to avoid breaking up with their primary partners who could not satisfy them sexually. Some women would cheat to stop their miserable and torturous relationships. Unfaithful women show the following signs after cheating in relationships:

a. They spend more time and money on their physical looks such as more facials, more makeup, fancy clothes, and more body shaping activities.

b. They come home late more often than before for various reasons.

c. They lose interest in having sex with their primary partners.

d. They act in strange ways with their phone calls or social media messages.

e. Their cell phones are always locked and muted at home.

f. They seem happier in themselves than before for no apparent reason.

g. They complain more to their husbands or boyfriends.

h. They show no interest in their partners' family members.

i. They do not pick up suspicious phone calls in front of their partners.

j. They prefer time alone more than before.

k. They start to lie about their suspicious behavior.

l. They take a large amount of money from joint bank accounts secretly.

m. They prepare to move out without clear explanations.

Most married women take infidelity more seriously than men. They are more likely to have guilt or shame after an adulterous affair. That is why women initiate divorces or separations after cheating on their partners because usually, they do not hold their internal struggles for very long after cheating on their partners. Women's affairs are seldom premeditated because most women want to build long-lasting relationships. I have summarized nine reasons behind women's cheating behavior.

1. Revenge on Their Cheating Man.

Revenge is the most popular reason for a woman to cheat. Some women get extremely mad when they find out their men have been cheating. This is because women have unrealistic and idealistic delusions about their partners. Women dream of their men playing roles as loving fathers, romantic princes, successful professionals, sexy lovers, and best friends. Men start to cheat after failing to meet their women's unreachable desires and needs. Women then resent their unfaithful men by cheating in retaliation.

2. Loneliness Due to Low Engagement.

Women cheat if their primary partners are too dull with very little engagement and shared interests. For example, women feel lonely if their men focus on sports activities without considering women's needs of shopping, movies, conversations, or other joint events. Women also cheat if their men work long hours or constantly travel for their jobs. Loneliness is one of the main reasons women search for companionship outside their current relationships for validation and a sense of existence.

3. No More Love to Their Partners.

Women demand more romantic passion and true love than men. They tend to leave their partners or cheat if they fall out of a romance with their men. They will be attracted to other men who make them feel sexy, adored, and respected if their partners ignore their passions. Women, by nature, look for happiness all the time in relationships. Men trap themselves into financial problems, job burdens, children's challenges, or personal crises without noticing their women's anger and frustration.

4. Low Self-esteem Issues.

Women with low self-esteem search for outside sexual activities for validation and recognition if they do not receive the expected attention, respect, and love from their partner. A woman in an abusive relationship has more tendency to cheat because she does not know how to build her confidence in her current situation. Women with low self-value would not stop their cheating cycles unless they rebuild their confidence and self-esteem.

5. Unsatisfied Sexual Life.

Women cheat to keep their current relationship because most women do not leave their partners due to men's sexual incompetence. To avoid hurting their men's feelings, some women do not communicate with their partners about being sexually unsatisfied. A woman with strong desires for sexual satisfaction does not tolerate low sex quality and frequency with her current partner. A sexually active woman feels bored of the same body after a long period.

6. Emotional Need for Intimacy and Romance.

Romance and intimacy are the essential needs for women in relationships. A woman who lacks intimacy with her partner searches for an affair to fulfill her needs. Women are vulnerable to other romantic men who come into their lives with romantic traits and intimate attraction. Most women cannot resist romantic, caring, loving, responsible, generous, and accountable men. Women walk away or cheat sooner or later if their men are too cheap, stingy, selfish, rude, disrespectful, disregardful, and uncaring.

7. Insecurity with their Current Relationship.

The three powerful words for women are "I LOVE YOU" from their man. Most women feel insecure, unhappy, and dissatisfied if their men refuse to say those three magic words. The most frequently asked question on this planet from a woman to her man is, "do you love me?". Women with childhood family crises or divorced parents feel more insecure in relationships. Women cheat for more than sexual reasons in many cases, the internal fear of a broken relationship can be the real driving force.

8. Alcohol or Drug Influence.

Women cheat under certain unexpected situations, such as being drunk or under the influence of a drug. A woman with depression or addiction problems might engage in a compulsive affair or addiction to sexual activities to cope with her mental disorder. Most women will regret their bad mistakes afterward.

9. Psychological Needs.

Some women with psychological issues might cheat to release themselves from an internal struggle of anxiety, especially those who like to keep sad feelings inside. A woman who is not happy with her current life might use cheating as an easy way out of a relationship without directly confronting the issues with her partner. A psychologically exhausted woman could cheat to find emotional balance, not necessarily just for physical pleasure.

Cheating or being cheated on are both poisons to a healthy relationship because the partners will destroy the trust in each other. Forgiving does not mean forgetting. An apology cannot cure the wound of hurt or betrayal. Both men or women, please think twice before making unfaithful moves without considering the eventual feeling of regret or guilt. Partners need to face their issues together by open communication and honest dialogue. Healing within the current relationship might be easier than jumping into a new relationship. After all, there is no perfect relationship in this world.


bottom of page